What Minecraft taught me about quitting porn

In the early parts of 2020, with Covid just beginning to impact life here in the US, I decided to set up a Minecraft server for our family.

It turned out to be great fun – we are now on our third world since Covid.

While I’ve had a Mojang account since my kids were little (2015), I never really played all that much – that said… I had a lot to learn.

Today, nearly 2 years later, I was thinking through all the things I’ve learned while playing Minecraft. But of course, I’m a guy who writes about finding freedom from porn, so I started thinking about how all I learned from Minecraft relates to quitting porn.

Take care of necessities first

When starting out in Minecraft you enter the game with nothing but the environment around you.

The world seems safe as everything is just starting to render in, but there are things generating in dark places that seek your life, and in many regards, you are not ready for it.

If you’re the guy who was comfortable with porn for some time before it took control of your life – this might be you.

For the rest of us who’ve played this game a time or two now – we realize it is only a matter of time before the dark arrives, and we are left to fight battles – unarmed, unprepared, and that we will lose if you don’t start preparing.

In the game, it’s getting a source of light and building walls around you so the enemy cannot see or get to you.

In real life, it is getting some light into our souls and our minds – starting to fill it with good things for us to focus on. It is also constructing walls between you and porn, masturbation, and lust.

If you’re lucky enough – maybe you’ve joined this game with a friend – facing it alone is a struggle. Facing it with another who is more experienced? Absolutely priceless!

Build a base camp

At this point you, have figured out how to harvest wood from the trees, gotten some food, or learned to fish or hunt. Oh and make torches to light up your world.

One of the most amazing advancements during this time is making a bed!

It is a lifesaver from having to make it through the night – when you start out, you have to hide in your little walled-in dirt enclosure and literally wait there until morning – otherwise it’s certain death – and you can’t run from it.

So you build a house.

It is much bigger than your little dirt hovel.

You have some room to put things you’ve found now.

It also has a door – woot woot! and windows!

Not only do you have greater protection in your house, you setup up a perimeter using fences and gates. And you light up everything with torches to make sure nothing dangerous spawns within.

As you gain control of your life, you are able to push a little bit outside survival and stake claim to the freedom Christ promises as you are filled with the light of his Word.

However, that does not mean everything is successful at this point – there are still failings, miscalculations, and unseen lurkers plotting your death.

In Shackle Road, we say getting to the first 66+1 days is the hardest – however, like building your basecamp – getting here is a game changer – literally.

Fight to recover what was lost when you can

Now you have started to gain some success – in Minecraft, this is gaining inventory – iron and diamonds to build weapons and armor. These better tools build better success – just like when you learn to control your thoughts, hack your habits, and masterfully avoid or lessen the impact of triggers.

So you venture out a bit into unfamiliar territory – you forget something – like your bed in Minecraft.

You are caught off guard with how far you’re from basecamp and come to realize that you will be in the woods alone at night – but not really alone, but with every demon seeking to take your life.

It ends in failure.

On the road to recovery, we have similar ventures.

We forget to prepare for some new routine.

We grow complacent and stop feeding our souls with good things to build our resilience.

Pride sets in and we think we got this now.

And then it happens… we fall.

It’s ok brother – it really is!

At Shackle Road we say – It’s about progress; not perfection!

In Minecraft, it says “You Died!” and you are mad or sad or disappointed, but there is a button there – what does it say?

“Respawn”

In our journeys to find freedom from porn or whatever, getting back up is one of the main traits of people who find success from addictions.

So you click the button and you are back at basecamp – where your bed is.

You sleep real quick to get through the night.

And run with your whole heart back to where you died to recover everything you lost, and you find it right where you fell.

There is great joy in this recovery!

And the greatest benefit you can get from this experience – is what to do differently next time.

Just a brief pause from me…

👇 FOLLOW ME 👇
Facebook and Twitter

When recovery of what was lost is not an option

Sometimes in Minecraft the failure is too great.

You are too far away to ever get there before all of your possessions despawn.

Maybe you just do not remember how to get back there.

Or maybe you fell into a pool of lava and there is just zero hope of ever getting back what you lost.

These are tragic times for us in recovery.

We ventured out.

Thinking we were finally good at conquering all our demons and then BLAM!

We experience a failure that maybe…

Makes someone give up on us
You hurt someone for the last time
You went too far, and now you’re facing prison

Whatever it is, it is just impossible for you to get back what was lost.

Brother.

As much as it stings to hear this – you still need to hit the “Respawn” button.

You need to get back up – once again.

Even for the thousandth time.

Maybe you’ve lost your bed, and you’re sent back to the beginning and back there again with nothing.

That’s ok.

You’ve learned a lot.

It’s time like these that deep evaluations occur.

What were you thinking?

How did this happen?

When did you get off the track of success?

And learn.

But there are harder questions to answer…

What now?

Where do you go from here?

Leave all the regret with God!

There is nothing you can do about it now, but learn from it and recommit to him once again that you’re his and he needs to rule over your life and be your strength.

Start over brother – do not give up here!

Greater victories await, as do challenges – Trust God.

Risk has its rewards

I am completely terrified of going into the Nether.

In Minecraft, the Nether is like hell – it’s hot, water is useless and you cannot place your bed to sleep – it’s a scary place.

My first experience was with my boys, who showed me how to go through the portal. Upon getting two steps in, I walked into lava and having never walked in lava before, I had no idea what to do, so I panicked. My boys? They just laughed and laughed.

However, I’ve grown to better understand how to navigate the Nether (and to not walk in lava) since that time.

Additionally, I have found some things about the Nether that are beneficial.

You can use the Nether to quickly travel far distances in the overworld
There is Soul Sand which is beneficial for creating water elevators for building Mob XP Farms
And much more…

In any case, I venture in prepared with the exact equipment that I need, to get the stuff I need.

And once I get what I need, I get out.

That is to say, I go in with a plan.

I do not risk an entire inventory of stuff – I bring only what I need.

And when I get it, I do not linger about, as to not give opportunity any chance to trip me up.

By the way, stating the obvious, this doesn’t guarantee success. When it doesn’t work out, take a look at the two sections above.

Fight one battle at a time

Ok, so in Minecraft there are these ‘people’ called pilliagers.

Their chief aim? To kill you!

They are pretty tough, and they come in groups of 2 to 5.

One of the things that used to mess me up is, I would run around so as to not get hit by their arrows and attack whoever was in front of me.

The problem with this approach is that none of them would die, but they would keep shooting me – usually ending in my death.

Then I learned something from my boys – fight one pillager at a time!

Additionally, if you aim to line them up, they will in fact shoot each other.

When beginning your journey of quitting porn, focus only on a few battles at a time – do not try to beat them all at once – it will lead to a fall.

One other thing I would draw attention to is that I learned this from others with more experience than myself. As is learning to stop watching porn – look for others to help you along the way.

The little buggers

A surprising enemy in Minecraft is baby zombies.

They move really fast, and will run up quickly – attack – and move away.

They are short – so when they are close and you attack them, it is likely you will miss them, as they are not the normal height.

It is important to note this about little things—

When addressed, they have a huge impact on your success,
When unaddressed, they often lead to a fall

Do not ignore them!

Think about what you might do, and be willing to experiment, to conquer these little buggers.

Silent killers

One word – Creepers.

These guys are bad enough when you know they are there, and take a lot of skill (in my opinion) to kill, but that is not the worst part.

Creepers make no noise – nothing – not a peep.

The only noise they make is the moment right before they explode.

Just imagine – you’re chopping down a tree while this little beast slithers up behind you – sssssssssssssst, then BOOM!

If you’re lucky you will live, but not without damage to you and to the landscape around you.

There is not a whole lot we can do when faced with these unexpected events that trip us up.

However, I have found that there is a benefit to being more aware of my surroundings when I am in more risky scenarios.

Yes, I may have to be outside of my basecamp, but simply paying attention can help me avoid harmful situations.

Oh. One more thing…

Know when to run

Refine and excel

Minecraft is about refining your skills, abilities, and capabilities.

As you improve your skills and make better equipment, you keep upping your game; reaching a point where you can enchant your equipment and armor.

While there is not a direct correlation here, the idea of learning small skills, reviewing and improving them, and then learning new ones over time, allows you to become better, to feel more free, and to have more confidence.

Build on your skills and do not try to short-cut your learning.

One block of water will save you from death

Falling from any height greater than 23 blocks in Minecraft results in death.

But there is a weird mechanic in the game.

If I land in a block of water – even if it is only 1 block deep – I will not die!

Regardless of how high I fall from.

As recorded in John chapter 4, Jesus said to the woman at the well – “Everyone who drinks of this water will thirst again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never thirst again; but the water that I will give him will become in him a well of water springing up to eternal life.”

Jesus has gone through great lengths to remove our failures, short-comings, and sins as the reason to be separated from God. He loves you and desires for you to know him.

That begins with trusting that his son, Jesus, paid the price for you.

That all who come to the Father come through him.

And he will give you of the water where you will never thirst again and that life will well up in you to not only satisfy your deepest desires, but it spills over and offers that life to others.

There is no life in playing it safe

The last thing… I know this has been a long read.

When I first played Minecraft, I did not go anywhere, I did not make anything, and worst of all, I did not learn anything.

When I started venturing out – I died a lot, and it made me mad.

I would get into situations that I did not know how to overcome – some of them so ridiculous that anyone with an ounce of skill would not have panicked and died like I did.

But here’s the thing – If I stayed at basecamp, I would have never learned to fight a creeper, to travel multiple days, to build amazing tools, and most importantly, live.

I would have just simply survived – survived and been safe.

Life is messy!

And we have a mediator – Jesus – who is acquainted with our weakness – and He stands before our Heavenly Father as an advocate of us.

There is work that God has prepared for us to walk in, and he has asked us to have courage

He will be our strength at all times.

One of my most favorite verses in the Bible is Psalms 37:4 – Trust in the Lord, and do good; Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

Be bold and offer your life to him.

Run the race as to win the prize!